Tuesday, May 28, 2013

The Birth of My Baby Bear, Part 1: Anticipation

When I went in for my 38 week appointment, I had been having contractions off and on days. This was quite different than when I was pregnant with June Apple, which basically went something like this: water broke, contractions started and 9 hours later and three pushes later, BAM! she was born. With this pregnancy, I had been feeling like I was just a visitor in this little (big) boy's body. His presence was so immense, I felt him every time he made a slight movement. I felt like he was pushing out of my uterus on all sides, perhaps as if to say, "Hey, I know my big sister is a little distracting, but don't forget about me!!" When I went in for my appointment, the midwife offered to strip my membranes, which I declined to do, wanting the process to just happen. As much as I wanted him to be born, I wanted him to come when he was ready, knowing that he'd prefer to call the shots. Plus, I was enjoying the anticipation, the unknowing, kind of like a surprise birthday party I knew was going to happen, but not when.When June Apple arrived at 37 weeks, I had yet to experience that anticipation, as I expected to be pregnant for several more weeks. Plus she was so tiny, she didn't feel as omnipresent in my body, thus I wasn't as anxious to have her on the outside, I was this guy. My bags were packed and ready.
I kept trying to have the nursery tidy and ready, but June Apple, the toddler tornado, had other plans.


On Saturday, September 16, my contractions had become more regular, but were not strong enough to stop me in my tracks. It was a beautiful day and we went to the farmers market and I soaked in our family of three, excited that it was soon to be four! We ran into several friends and I was excited knowing that the next time I saw them, I would have our baby boy with us!





I spent the afternoon reading my go-to birthing books, filled with lovely birth stories to get me in the right frame of mind. Many women talk about turning inward in the days leading up to child birth. I found myself feeling quieter, reserved, calm, peaceful. The anticipation of the previous days and weeks seemed to drift away, and I felt ready to receive.
In keeping with tradition, I decided to share a meal with my good friend, Angela. You might remember that I ate dinner at Angela's house the night I went into labor with June Apple, so I thought, I'd keep that good thing going. We ate at an awesome Cuban restaurant. I ordered a spicy, garlicky dish and spent some time carrying June Apple around, hoping that the extra exercise might move things along. Contractions were present, but not stronger than they had been that morning and I went to sleep, hoping for a good nights rest, feeling like the next day would be a busy one.

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