Fair game

Amos recently played the Kentucky State Fair, so I thought it was high time that I expose June Apple to all things great about the state fair, ie funnel cakes and cows. And apparently, fake flower arrangement competitions. Our good friend Emily went along for the good times, and a good time it was! Here are some highlights from the day:

 

****Note the powdered sugar belly. Good 'till the last lick!*****

Another wonderful event occurred this past weekend, one of my dearest bestie, Britten's wedding! Not only was I in the honored position of serving as a bridesmaid, but June Apple made her debut as a flower girl. Of course, all of our practice at cleaning up after ourselves at home, came in handy when she dutifully picked up all the flower petals along the way, as soon as the other flower girl, Jolene let them fall. Poor Jolene, 4 years old, was a bit distressed at this kink in the plan, so I needed to come out and help Miss June along, so Jolene could go ahead with her important job. June Apple is VERY energetic these days, and were it not for Amos, my mom, my mother-in-law, and my dad, all being at the wedding to help wrangle her, I probably would have gone in to labor from running around after her. Instead, I got to enjoy being pampered and made up, and getting my hair did with other gorgeous ladies, as well as dance the night away surrounded by some of my most favorite people. I was so, so, so honored and blessed to be a part of Britt's special and beautiful day. I am so excited for her and her new life with her wonderful husband, David. Yay for love!

So, although there was a torrential downpour outside when it was time to take my pic for week 37. But boy, was I joyous! Time keeps on tickin' tickin' tickin' into the future.....

Dear Baby Bear,

Mama was a dancing queen this past weekend. I hope you enjoyed the extra boogie party! I'm guessing that you did, since you boogie so much on your own in Mama's tummy all day, every day! You have been in the same position (head down, butt up, with your feet poking my right side) for several weeks. Hopefully you'll stay put in this position, because that is exactly where you need to be for a smooth delivery! You love to kick my side and your Papa and I can see your feet and little butt pushing, pushing, saying, "Let me outta here!" Soon enough, Baby, soon enough.

Your Papa, big sister and I love you very much.

Love,
Mama

Sprinkler

This week my mom and and wonderful friend, Emily, threw me a lovely baby "sprinkle" at my house, which included a bunch of wonderful ladies, great food and I scored some awesome decorated onesies for Baby Bear to wear each month for his monthly pics. It was so much fun! Here are some pictures from the day:

 

                    

Here is my pic from week 36. Can't believe we are getting so close! I have so much to do! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!

Dear Baby Bear,

We are getting closer to coming up with a good "short list" for your name. We won't make a final decision until you are born and we meet you, face to face. I hope that you help us make the decision an easy one! Choosing a name for someone is no small task. Maybe you can send us a sign of what you'd like to be called.  Either way, help a mama out, will ya?

Your Papa, June Apple and I love you very much,
Love,
Mama

Vacay in Paradise!

Needless to say, we had a wonderful, relaxing vacation in Florida. Last year, June Apple and I were sequestered in the house for much of the time because she was too young to wear sunscreen. This year, we soaked up the sun, sand, and waves to the fullest extent! June Apple loved the ocean so much we could only spend short amounts of time in the water, because she constantly was trying to wriggle free from our arms. She loved the pool, and we watched her like a hawk, because one minute she'd be splashing on the side of the pool and then she would just dive right in.

I had lots of school related work to do, which had me slightly overwhelmed. So perhaps it was a blessing in disguise that our wifi connection sucked, so my ability to work on my dissertation was extremely limited, so I was actually "forced" to relax and enjoy myself. What a shame ;)

Our friends who live in Florida, Allen and Jeanette came to visit us for a couple days with their boys, Gabriel and Pablo. I was curious to see how June Apple would do with Gabe, 3 years and baby Pablo, who is 9 months old. Needless to say, she was SMITTEN. In fact I think her outpouring show of love overwhelmed them, as she was always trying to hug and kiss them. She was enamored with Pablo and wanted to sit in anyone's lap that was holding him, so she coud get closer. She also wanted to help feed him and "help" in any way she could. Good practice run for whats to come. She never seemed to be jealous when I was holding him and I was happy to see how much she enjoyed both boys, or as she called the, "My Babies."

So here are some photo highlights from our time there. Can't wait to go back next year with Baby Bear in tow!

So, here's a pic of me at 35 weeks, right after our return from sunny Florida.

Dear Baby Bear,

I wonder if you will love the water as much as we all do. It certainly felt so amazing to swim on our vacation with you in my belly because I could weightless for a little bit. Can't wait to take many vacations with you and jump in the waves together!

We love you very much,

Mama

Leaving on a jet plane...

So, this week we go on vacation! Amos left about a week before us, and was kind enough to take all of our luggage down to Florida with him. Last year we all drove together, and in my memory, June Apple cried nearly 70 percent of the hellish 15 hours we were in the car. I was not going through that again! Her car threshold maxes out as about 1 1/2 hours. Plus, the idea of riding in the car, as pregnant as I am, for that long, sounded pretty awful. So, with our midwives blessing, I decided to fly down.  Since Amos had taken all of our stuff with him, all I really needed to bring was what we might need en route on the plane, a stroller, and her car seat (the latter two I was able to check- for free!). I scoured the blogosphere, as well as asked my friends with babies who were seasoned flyers, for tips on how to keep a toddler happy in my diminishing lap for the two, 1 1/2 hour flights we would be taking to get there and back. Below is a picture of everything I was able to cram in to a backpack, the contents of which included: snacks for both of us, a change of clothes for both of us, books, a mini-magnadoodle, my laptop, my iPhone, plenty of diapers and wipes, my purse, June's loveys, my purse, various toiletries in case of emergency, a sippy cup for JA and a water bottle for me. Whew! I can't believe I got it all in! And needless to say, we used much of what I packed.

June Apple was an awesome travel buddy and we had lots of fun running around the terminal looking at planes and practicing her new walking skills.

On the planes, albeit a bit cramped with her long body and my big belly, we did pretty well. The biggest hits that kept her occupied included the magnadoodle, books, and my iPhone. Of course, she thoroughly enjoyed chatting with all the fellow passengers and charming everyone with her endless wit. She even managed to get a few winks here and there!

So we landed safely in Florida, we eagerly met up with Amos who we had missed dearly in our week apart, and we hit the road heading straight for the beach! Smooth sailing (or flying) for June Apple's first trip through the friendly skies.

Although not the greatest picture, taken before bed on night, here I am, 34 weeks and counting....look at the belly! There is a baby in there!

 

Dear Baby Bear,

I can't wait to take you on adventures with us. Your Papa and I have always had the travel bug and we hope that someday, perhaps soon, we can all go on fun trips, not only to the beach, but to far and away places that peak your curiosity and fill you with a love for trying new foods and peeking around new corners and meeting new people and seeing things you never thought possible. I can't wait to be along for the ride with you and try and see the new world through your eyes!

You Papa, June Apple and I love you very much.

Love,

Mama

33 weeks

Let the vacationing begin! Last week, June Bug and I were recovering from a nasty bout of the stomach bug, all thanks to some infectious little rug rat at a bridal shower we went to (all the kids and one, unlucky pregnant lady) got sick. Amos left us a couple days ago to make his way down to Florida, with all of our vacation gear, and June Apple and I will fly down to meet him later this week. I had originally made our plans thinking that I couldn't take the time off of my internship, but as the time grew near, I realized, with Amos gone, I wouldn't have anyone to watch June during said internship, so I had to take the time off anyway! Kind of a bummer because I would've gone to Florida much earlier, but it is what it is, and our tickets couldn't be changed. AH well. I'll just soak up the special one on one time with June Apple, before her little brother joins us. It also means a week of single parenthood, which is TIRING! Big props to all those single moms and dads out there! Here are some pics from our week thus far:

So, June Apple and I are spending our days lying around, running errands to prep for our trip, and eating tons of fruit (see picture above). I've also had to squeeze in time to work on the first chapter of my dissertation in prep for a meeting this week, along with prepping for a human development class I am teaching in the fall. How perfect to be pregnant/birthing a baby and teaching human development. I am sure all my 18 year old freshman students will appreciate how perfect it is. Perhaps I will treat them with a video of the birth. Good times ahead!

June Apple and I will take our first flight together this week, so check back for an update on how we survived that. I didn't buy her a seat, since she is young enough to fly for free, if she sits on my (diminished) lap. Fingers crossed the flight attendants feel sorry for us and move us to business class.....

Above is a picture from week 33. Week 32's picture didn't happen in the wake of the stomach flu. trust me. It wouldn't have been pretty.

Dear Baby Bear,

I really hope you weren't feeling sick when I was last week. You certainly were flipping around a lot, which is all at once comforting and sickening, when Mama has the stomach flu. 

After Papa left for Florida, your sister and I went to the grocery store to buy food for the week. When I got to the checkout, I realized I had 10 pounds of fruit (no kidding) and a couple gallons of milk. Baby Bear, you have been all about the natural sweetness these days that fruit brings. I take it as a beautiful sign of whats to come.

The days are getting closer....

Your Papa, June Apple and I love you very much.

Love,
Mama

Three's Company

In line with last week's post on breastfeeding, I thought I'd write a little about our choice to have June Apple sleep with us. Unlike nursing, sharing our bed was not something I had consciously made a decision to do, before she came along. In fact, I even believe I utter those fateful words as a non-parent, "I will never let my kids sleep with us." The truth was, then, I cherished my sleep and space, too much. At the time I said this, my wise friend, a mother of two, smiled and just said, "We'll see about that." Touche'. 

When June Apple was born and it was just the two of us alone, in the middle of the night, in my hospital room, I looked over at her, sooo tiny in her hard plastic bassinet, and I just couldn't bear to have her sleep anywhere by cradled in my arms. When we got home, her nursing schedule was exhausting, feeding every hour, it was a matter of SURVIVAL for her to be right next to me. In the beginning she did sleep in a co-sleeper bassinet right next to our bed, but would also sleep in the crook of my arm, many nights. In her first year, she also slept in her crib many naps and nights. But then around 7 months, my work/school schedule ramped up. Several days during the week I would be gone for 10 hours or longer. Around this time, June Apple stopped sleeping through the night, waking up to nurse more and more. I took this as a sign of her need to be close to me, after spending so many hours away. So I started bringing her in to our bed and more.

And then I got pregnant, when she was about a year old, and the mixture of nausea and sciatic nerve pain made it excrusicating to bend over her crib night after night, rubbing her back and trying to sooth her back to sleep. So I just gave in and brought her into our bed, where she has remained ever since. She started sleeping through the night again, and when she does wake, she settles very quickly, and we ALL get better sleep, which is much, much appreciated. My views about where a baby/child sleeps is this: we decide what works best for all of us, in our family. It might not be what would work in another family, for the parents, or the children. But it is what has worked for us.

When Baby Bear comes along, I'm not sure what the sleeping arrangements will be. I don't intend to all of a sudden send June to her crib. My most immediate plan is to have Baby Bear in the co-sleeper and June between Amos and I. I am committed first and foremost to what is safe for Baby Bear, and while I have a very strong trust in my innate ability to be aware of him on our bed, I do not expect Ms. June to be similarly so. Safe co-sleeping suggests that older children should not share a bed with a baby, and for good reason. So for now, he will be in his bassinet, as June Apple was when she was born. In truth, our house is tiny and we don't have room for two cribs anyway. We are planning on moving in the next year or so, at which point, we will encourage June to move to a Big Girl bed, perhaps in her own room, and take it from there. But for now, we will all be together in our room, using the nursery for naps. And who knows what will be best for Baby Bear? Perhaps he will sleep better in the crib. Perhaps June will decide she needs her own space. But we will play it by year and continue to listen and respond to what is best for all of us.

And in other news, my week 31 picture:





Dear Baby Bear,

I promise to do my very best to listen to what is right for you and our family. I know others might do things differently, and their advice to us is well-intentioned and based on what worked best for them. But they are not us. So I will watch you, and listen to you, and change my mind if you need me to, and love and care for you the very best that I can.

Your Papa, big sister and I love you very much.

Love,
Mama

Mama Milt

I always planned to breastfeed our children, after lugging around my ridiculously large jugs for half my life- I certainly was looking forward to putting them to excellent use! Of all three major tenets of attachment parenting (breastfeeding, babywearing, bedsharing), breastfeeding was the one that was MOST important to me. As some of you may have read in my earlier posts, when June Apple was born, I relied heavily on the support of a wonderful lactation consultant, as well as friends and family, to make sure that she and I both got off to a great start. It was rough at first, because she was so small and she was tongue-tied, but once we got going, we've never looked back! As a low-birth weight baby, I knew how important breastmilk was to her health and brain development. In fact low birth weight babies benefit the MOST from breastmilk, compared to all other babies. I wanted to help my little Squirrel Girl however I could, and I am sooo grateful I had this natural, built-in food source that was so valuable to her. June Apple has been very healthy thus far, enjoying those immunity building benefits, no doubt. Not to mention that I love the special bonding time we've shared!

When I got pregnant with Baby Bear, June Apple was about a year and I wasn't ready to wean her quite yet. According to my midwife, there was no reason for me to stop nursing her, so we forged on. I did end up night-weaning her early in my pregnancy, because I needed the extra sleep. She adjusted well after a couple rough nights, and now only usually nurses before bed and naps. Looking back over the course of this pregnancy, there have certainly been times that nursing her has been painful, or physically irritating, because of my increased hormone levels. However, one of the huge benefits of nursing her is that I have been forced to lie down and rest several times a day to nurse her- providing a MUCH needed break. I know myself well enough to know, with everything going on right now, I would not have been likely to take the time to rest like this otherwise. I am unsure about what it will be like once Baby Bear arrives, but I am sure we will figure it out and I will be sure to report on how it all goes. In the meantime, June Apple sure does love her "Mama Milt" (her words).
 
Here is my pic from week 30. This picture doesn't capture nearly how miserably hot its been. Note to all the future pregnant ladies out there- try and be pregnant over the winter!
                        



                    

Dear Baby Bear,

I hope that when you come along it will be cooler than it has been lately. Many say this is the hottest summer they can remember. Will next summer be hotter? Who knows? Just be grateful that you've been able to spend this summer in a climate controlled mama-belly, and not out here sweatin' with the rest of us. Of course, your body acts like an little internal combustion engine, keeping me additionally toasty! Here's to cooler days and nights ahead!

Your Papa, big sister and I love you very much,
Love,
Mama

Securely Attached

I have been meaning to comment on the recent hub bub over the Time Magazine cover that pictured a woman breastfeeding her 3 year old, with the headline, "Are You Mom Enough?" The cover photo was, in the very least sensational, and proved to be effective in sparking conversation and controversy about the practice of attachment parenting. Many people seem to misunderstand attachment parenting and think that its about being tied to your children forever and creating a family environment that lacks boundaries. Some misinformed critics say that the promotion of attachment parenting leads to the further oppression of women, pressuring them to sacrifice themselves for the sake of their children and putting their children's needs above all else. This has not been my experience. While I am sure that there are parents who interpret the attachment parenting philosophy and transform it into its extreme forms. Just as there are parents on the opposite end of the spectrum who take the notion of "sleep training" their babies to the extreme, and never go to their children when they cry in the night, for fear that they will ruin their child's ability to "self-soothe." The truth is being a parent, and perhaps especially, a mother, is a nerve-wracking, vulnerable, scary and exhilarating experience. We all are in search of "the right way". Or perhaps just simply, what will screw our kids up the least?

I've had the privilege of sharing in the intimate lives of many, many families over the years. I began babysitting at age 11, worked as a full-time nanny or au pair on and off throughout my twenties and more recently, as a child and family therapist. And of course there are all the wonderful friends and family members whose lives I have shared and participated in their journey into the parenting abyss. Countless times I have had the honor of bearing witness to that look in a new mother's eyes that look at me and say, "Holy Cow! I can't believe someone expects me to know what to do!" And I saw how they, as perhaps we all do, long for the answers, long to be able to figure it out, to achieve family bliss. 


When we became new parents, I came in with the advantage of knowing about a lot of the technical "baby care taking" stuff. But of course, being a parent is much more than knowing about swaddling and diapers. Parenthood, thus far, has been similar to what I know many parents experience when they have a baby- periods of triumph and joy amidst stumbling blindly through a sea of the unknown. One of our biggest guiding forces in knowing what to do is following our intuition and hearts. Everyone around us has a well-intentioned opinion based on, usually, what worked for their family. And what we are always trying to do is stay true to finding what works for OUR family. And it may be different than what other families do, and it may not be something that worked for other parents, but we are committed to do what feels right, and what makes us all happy.


For us, we found ourselves practicing attachment parenting, partly out of necessity (more on that coming up) and mostly out of, simply, what felt right. Over the next few weeks, I will talk about what that looks like in our family, focusing mainly on the Three B's of Attachment Parenting: Breastfeeding, Babywearing, and Bedsharing.


In the meantime, here's a pic of me at 29 weeks:

Dear Baby Bear,

It still feels so unreal that you are are going to be here. As you grow bigger and bigger and my belly gets bigger and bigger, I know your going to be in our lives before we know it. Your sister, June Apple, has been practicing her big sister skills on her stuffed animals, which she calls, "My Babies." She likes to tuck them in at night, by putting pillows over them. We promise to refine her tucking in skills before you come, to make sure there are no pillows on top of you! I think she will be so excited when she meets you and give you lots and lots of hugs and kisses.

Your big sister, Papa and I love you so much.

Love,

Mama